1.10.2010

An Intimate Affair

I find myself sitting here at nearly 2:00 am watching back episodes of Burn Notice, and rather than thinking about Bruce Campbell's unfortunate beer gut and Miami Beach lounge wear, my mind is consumed with pubic hair. Dear reader, I warn you now, this post may seem crass or dirty or just plain gross, but when Bobbi's got a problem, Bobbi's gotta vent.

I have decided female pubic hair should be illegal. I'll extrapolate. Last night I enjoyed an entire trough of hot and sour soup at my favorite Chinese joint, and of course found my bladder in need of relief. As I enter the public restroom the restaurant shares with the parking garage next door, not one, not two, but all six toilets in the stalls presented me with a gift in the form of pube covered seats.

Now I am not sure that a similar occurrence could happen in the men's room--I don't exactly frequent men's rooms, but I am sure men would be equally disgusted. Yes I know we must work harder, actually pulling down our pants and sitting down to relieve ourselves, but because of that must we be so lazy to not properly dispose of any stray hairs? And after a little flush is it really too much to as to just do a little seat wipe down? You can't think it is gross if it is your own hair. And if you do think it is gross, maybe you shouldn't have any anyway.

So maybe it doesn't need to be outlawed, but I'm thinking a serious campaign for proper pubic grooming, maintenance and cleanup needs to be considered. You wouldn't pee on the seat and just leave it there like a drunk frat brother. You wouldn't clip your toenails and leave the little buggers on the kitchen counter, so why not just properly dispose of your curly q's.

Now. Was that really so much to ask?

2 comments:

Aloquin said...

I agree with you whole-heartedly, except on one point... people
DO pee on the seats, and DO leave it there. Sad, sad.

Anonymous said...

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Joan Stepsen
Computer geeks