The Groutfitti Culture

Yesterday I had the pleasure of sitting through a mandatory meeting addressing the concern of the overtake of groutfitti in the men's room at work.

What is groutfitti one may ask (believe me I had no idea)? Groutfitti is the idiotic idea of writing jokes encompassing the word grout in grout-lines between the tiles above urinals.  

First of all, why would anyone have the desire to write jokes about grout.  There is nothing funny about grout.  It is boring and grows bacteria and is hard to clean.  Not a laughing matter.

As the meeting progressed, it was made clear that the issue itself was not that of groutfitti, but rather that it had expanded to the wall, which was apparently not ok.

So then, what is it that makes writing on the space in-between the tiles perfectly acceptable, but then it isn't ok to write on the wall itself?  

Because my lack of urinal experience made me question this culture as a whole, I posed the simple question "why can't you guys just pee and be done with it."  
The male response I received?
"Because we have a free hand!"

I'm sorry, while I pee, I have two free hands, but it doesn't mean I sit on the toilet and make origami swans.

Having a free extremity doesn't mean you have to use it, and if you are going to multitask, it should at least be constructive.

So by the end of the painstaking half our the conclusion was drawn to provide the able handed gentlemen with a white board above the urinal to voice their opinions.  

And when I mentioned that we are not in first grade and do not write on our bathroom walls at home, a conference table full of blank stares looked back at me.

So maybe I'm wrong and should put up some butcher paper next to the toilet tank and let the enabling of childish habits thrive.


The Artists' Sandbox said...

omigod! butcher paper is exactly what we need!! i was gonna suggest a dry erase board halfway through reading but at the end, i was pleasantly surprised to hear you had an even better suggestion!! not sure how to keep pens from walking away, although i guess we usually have them on us anyway, or people wouldn't be having meetings discussing the matter.

but the whole idea in general anyway... it's kind of entertaining. you just never know what you're gonna wind up walking away thinking about. it's usually peanut gallery blue humor, but every once in a while you get something hilarious like, "i saw you take that shit! now put it back!" and you just chuckle cause you imagine the idiot scribbling it on the back of the door just so when you turn around and sit, it's right in your face.

makes you realize we're not the people we portray on tv. and kids do grow up and never become adults. and those guys make me laugh:)

Bobbi Noodle said...

oh. the pen was a huge issue. people were like "what if it falls in the urinal!"

so we decided to hang it up with a string well fixed to the whiteboard.

The Artists' Sandbox said...

i say you post photos of the entries on your blog.

you know you could have some fun with this white board. you should sneak in there and write, "is that all you got?" or something else funnier. there's bound to be something else funnier.

do you do things like that?:)

Bobbi Noodle said...

hah. you are right. i should. it will be the ongoing story of the whiteboard groutfitti.

The Artists' Sandbox said...

i can already foresee a meeting in a week concerning the female staff members discussing how unfair the situation has become and in turn demanding a whiteboard for the ladies restroom.

My Little Hands said...

I totally agree that you should find a way to encourage bad behavior on that whiteboard. How grand to waste 30 minutes on that conversation - and to have the result be organized indulgence.




http://mitcho.com/blog/life/bathroom-graffiti/ (make sure to view the PDF file.. the grout ones are at the bottom)

Chrisy said...

Oh my lord...you poor thing...yes put the board and pens up...even suggest a webcam....maybe start up a flickr group with pics of groutfitti...

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